The emotions are one of four parts of the intelligent system of wholeness. Wholeness comes from the balance of body, emotions, mind and spirit. The emotions are an amazing part of the system of wholeness all by themselves. They provide feedback regarding how we are doing, which path is the right one to take, which people are good for us to be around and which goals are worthwhile. When the whole system is in balance, emotions are felt, expressed, shared and received freely.
Love is the best example of this. If we are able to feel unconditional love within ourselves for another, we are able to give ourselves one of the greatest gifts of well being. Sometimes, when we feel love within ourselves when in the presence of someone else, we mistakenly think that our love belongs to that other person. Actually, the love that we feel is triggered by the other person but it belongs to us, the person feeling it. When love is mutual, it gives back more than double the well-being for both people.
Sometimes, when we experience difficult emotions we can feel an inner conflict. This happens when we feel that our emotions are outside of our control, like when they are triggered by someone we care about or our emotions catch us unprepared or feeling unprotected. Those kinds of experiences can cause us to shut down the emotions or repress feelings. The problem with shutting down emotions is that we can’t select which emotions are going to be numbed so consequently, all of them get muted, until something unexpected happens and numbing lid comes off, like in a fit of anger or rage. It is important to work toward understanding your emotions and why they are so strong regarding certain people or experiences. One question to ask yourself is…have I ever felt this way before? And then write what comes up in a stream of consciousness way. The results will bring you one step closer to understanding yourself and clearing your emotional field.
Our emotions are an important part of living life to the fullest. Emotions are the expression of joy and happiness. They help in sensing what is good or bad for you, making choices, knowing yourself, having compassion and relating to others.
The body is one of four parts of the intelligent system of wholeness. Wholeness comes from the balance of body, emotions, mind and spirit. The human body is an amazing part of the system of wholeness all by itself. It provides feedback regarding how the rest of the system is doing. The body provides us with mobility, sensuality, confidence, healing, feedback, and expression of internal states.
Healthy food intake and regular exercise are the mantras of popular culture. So many of us have developed good habits of treating our bodies well. We care for the body internally with organic foods and herbal remedies at the first sign of illness or imbalance. We take care of the external body by tending to it’s surface needs with creams, massages, oils, and various other treatments. We care for the body by going to the doctor for regular checkups, knowing that early screenings can provide useful information and strategies for maintaining optimal health.
Why do we do all of this? For some, the answer is to live a healthy lifestyle. For some it is to live healthier into old age. For some it is to manage stress. For some it is because of external pressures, like doctor’s orders or family pressure. These are all motivators, some more positive than others.
Louise Hay, back in 1976 in her book “Heal Your Body” drew a connection between the health of mind and health of the body. For example, she identified someone experiencing a migraine headaches as someone who might also be engaged in self-criticism or fear. There have been many studies revealing a link between the body and emotions, particularly in the area of trauma. Feelings and emotions can be suppressed by the mind but the body can express emotions or as Bessel van der Kolk has written “The Body Keeps the Score”. Negative emotions have been linked to illness and disease, including eating disorders, addiction and pain.
With an optimally functioning body we have the freedom to bring balance to the other three parts of our whole system of intelligence. Emotions, Mind and Spirit in conjunction with a well functioning body can help us to make decisions that are based on subtle and not so subtle information from the whole system. Have you ever gotten into a discussion with someone and you start to feel anxious or threatened? Have you ever felt your energy drain by a conversation or topic that someone else brings up? In either example your anxiety is valuable sign that something is not right for you regarding the situation at hand. That feedback could be something that you look at more closely later or it might be giving you information to act upon more quickly. Maybe the anxiety is informing you that you need to give yourself a break from the discussion, or to let the other person know that the conversation is not one you choose to engage in at that moment. The anxiety might also be telling you to excuse yourself and leave.
Using the body to cope with anxiety by stretching stretching and deep breathing can also provide relief.
Next time: Key #2 Emotions
Ever notice how your energy and mood can change during the day? Maybe you start out with good intentions for a happy day but somehow, seemingly insignificant things begin to challenge your good intentions. By the end of the day, you’re feeling drained, exhausted and snarky. How did you loose sight of your good intention…a happy day?
Throughout the day your intelligent system of body, emotions, mind and spirit, got compromised and began to shut down and close to negativity. Problem is, when you are defensive, positivity is blocked as well negativity. Your authentic self goes into hiding and you function under the mask of getting by. Your amazing system: body, emotions, mind and spirit, are just functioning instead of intending, like they were in the beginning of the day.
#1 Eating well and exercising your body is important. It is one key to maintaining a well balanced, open, happy system. Non healthy choices take energy away from the whole. Health, nutrition, exercise, and sleep are but a few of the restorative processes for the body.
#2 The second key to living a happy life is in keeping your emotional system cleared. This takes a regular practice of understanding what you are feeling and knowing why. You can’t have emotional clutter and expect to have clear emotions. Emotional clutter makes it difficult to sort out just what you are feeling because your personal history maybe complicating your ability to utilize your emotions to move you to or keep you in a happy state. Therapy can help eliminate emotional clutter by processing emotional experiences. Then, a regular habit of feeling emotions and identifying why they are triggered, helps you to put words to your experience, instead of rage, or numbing or ignoring them.
#3 Thirdly, managing negative thoughts is key #3 in maintaining a happy life. In any given moment you get to choose whether to fuel a negative thought or to shift your thought to one that is more productive. The more you practice stopping negative thoughts, the more free your energy will be for what you really intend, like being happy. You can ask yourself…is what I am focused on helping me to create my happy life? If the answer is ‘no’…work on shifting your thought to one that is more in alignment with your intended…happy life.
#4 Finally, maintaining an open spirit is key #4 in maintaining a happy life. A clogged spirit/soul happens when we allow ourselves to be distracted by outside influences, instead of what our being actually wants for our higher good. Outside influences are not necessarily wrong or bad but they quiet your healthy inner voice that knows what the next step is on your journey of self fulfillment and happiness. It is always your choice as to how much or how often you allow yourself to be distracted from you.
When these channels shift from being clogged to being open and clear, your happy life will follow.
Next Blog Topic: Key #1 The Body